And the next amusing story,
a classic from the Daily Star. This one cracked me up!
OZZY OSBOURNE THE CAVEMAN: ROCKER’S DNA LINK TO THE STONED AGE
BAT-munching rocker Ozzy Osbourne is officially a caveman.
Scientists who mapped his genes found he was linked to the Neanderthals and has a body programmed for booze.
The Black Sabbath singer is one of the first people in the world to have tests to unravel his DNA.
They also revealed he was related to Romans who died in Pompeii when the volcano Vesuvius erupted almost 2,000 years ago.
Ozzy, 61, was told he was part- Neanderthal just months after experts first proved the primitive race had bred with humans.
He said: “That won’t come as much of a surprise to the missus, or various police departments around the world. This is big news for blokes everywhere, if the Neanderthals could get laid, there’s hope for us all.”
He also joked about sharing DNA with the Vesuvius victims.
“If any of the Roman Osbournes drank nearly as much as I used to, they wouldn’t have even felt the lava. They could have just walked it off.”
The results showed Ozzy was 6.13 times more likely than the average person to get hooked on booze and 1.31 times more prone to cocaine addiction.
Doctors found a twist in a gene that means he can soak up more alcohol than most.
But the former addict joked: “I used to drink four bottles of Cognac a day.
“I’m not sure I need a Harvard scientist to get to the bottom of that mystery.”
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